Whitney? Why?

Watched the new NBC sitcom Whitney for the first time last night. It was INSPIRING! If this hella-hack shit can get on TV, I’ve got a series in my future!

The episode “Clarence” was their latest – so they should’ve gotten near their funny groove having done 7 previous episodes. Not really. They may need 70 more.

Premise: Whitney and boyfriend want a puppy to prove their commitment. Twist: since they’re unmarried they have to get an old dog – Clarence. You know, because there’s only ONE place per city to get a puppy!

He’s sickly, can’t play fetch and drops horrific farts. Pay-off: The dog dies after a day and they return to status quo. Lesson: Whitney would make a great hospice nurse.


Sitcom funny comes from a character failing in an ordinary situation because of their flaws or creating an outlandish circumstance because of their flaws. You need to be extreme, you BOOGER-BITING RETARD!

Boyfriend gets puppy, but Whitney treats it like a neglectful parent because that’s how she was raised. The puppy is crying to be walked, but Whitney is watching a movie and doesn’t want to leave. She dangles a treat while the dog runs on a treadmill. “You’re looking a little chubby, greedy. Gimme another mile.”

But what do I know? I’m not dating any network execs.


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